A couple of months ago Mini-me and I were chatting about holidays and things to do. After a glass or 2 of wine we decided a week in the sun doing nothing except soaking up the sun and drinking cocktails was the definite way forward. OH and her bf weren’t getting an invite – this was going to be a girly, mother ‘n’ daughter sunshine romp! As it was much cheapness it didn’t take me long to book an all-inclusive holiday in Tunisia.
I had to work right up until the last minute as I was oncall and unfortunately ended up having to go out and do a visit grrr. However, as this didn’t give me a lot of time to pack it ended up being a good thing as I didn’t keep putting last minute essentials into my suitcase as I usually do when I have time and room to spare.
Leaving our home town well and truly behind Mini-me drove us to the secure car park next to Edinburgh airport. Although it was £36 to park for the week it turned out to be hassle free and money well spent. As, as if by magic, the screen next to the barrier lit up with our surname (having electronically read Mini-me’s registration) and invited us to take a ticket and then to park anywhere we found a space. We then walked to the nearest bus stop and in less than 5 minutes a bus picked us up and deposited us at the airport. There was no queue at check-in so we skipped ahead to security and with no liquid nitrogen or hidden bombs in our shoes we were allowed through to test as many perfumes as we wanted.
Stinking like two expensive hookers but looking like a middle age mum and daughter going on holiday we hit the bar and ordered our first drink of our trip. £9.10 for 2 drinks – roll on all-inclusive alcohol!
Even before we had finished our drinks our flight was being called and before we knew it we were sitting on the flight and ready for take off.
You could tell it was a holiday flight and everyone was gearing up for a fun time as there were people drinking cans of Tennents behind me and women sneaking drink from their duty free stash in front. The pilot soon put paid to this and made announcement involving the illegality of it and the police being there to greet the flight when we landed. It was just a threat at this stage but it ended up being one he had to follow through on because then some complete twat decided to have a fly ciggie in the toilet. Then, when he was caught, instead of putting it out properly he threw it into the paper towel bin and nearly set the plane alight. The pilot sounded really pissed off with his next announcement and obviously the police had to be contacted this time.
Thankfully it wasn’t as ‘exciting’ as it could have been and our flight details didn’t need to be mentioned on the 10 o’clock news!
With hindsight I maybe should have tried to set the flight alight as we may have got through passport control a bit quicker. It was the worst bit of the holiday so far! Everyone was tired, pissed off and short tempered. Including Mini-me who nearly started WW3 when an glammed up old German woman tried to push in the queue in front of her. Mini-me was haivng none of it and put the glamorous granny firmly in her place, which was behind Mini-me.
Eventually, we got to our hotel and were immediately shown to the dinning area where thoughtfully they had left out some bread and salad. Unfortunately, before we got there a swarm of locus descended on the buffet and wiped it out within minutes. Mind you, grated carrot on flat bread turns out to be quite nice when you’re tired and hungry.
We were then given our room key (minus our bags) and off we trotted to see what delights were in store for us. A swan made from towels holding a couple of sweets tried to hide the fact that the room was best described as adequate. Saying that, it was clean and had air conditioning so it was better than some beach hotels I have stayed in.
The bags arrived and we departed to search for the bar. Mini-me was on lager and I decided it was a gin night. We sat til midnight making sure there was consistency in each drink. Happily there were no issues with the free alcohol.